moanlog – Anonymous moaning

Just as when I was little, I wish someone would just say they love me for who I am and they want to spend forever with me. I'm not that awful am I?

whilst everyone I know is moving on up, buying a house, getting married, i'm stuck in the same positon i was in 4 years ago. meh

Wish someone would just make my day, feel like all I do is for the happiness of others. When is it my turn to be happy and spoilt?

yet another person who is engaged, when will it be my turn?

returning all your xmas gifts, what's the fucking point. brat

everything and more in your hands on a plate daily. what a fucking fool

Appreciate what you have before it fucking becomes what you had, dumb fuck

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck you

Unappreciative

So angry with your fucking friends. You come up here, where I've been making my life for years, and they make you into this thing which you're completely not and you just go along with it. And suddenly my friends think I'm living in your shadow? Fuck them. I'm happy. My life is fucking great. And if this shit doesn't calm down it's going to get real fucking boring real fucking fast. I hate them for taking everything I had away from me and changing everything. That's not how it's supposed to work.

My mother in law, a fuck wit of global proportion.

Want to want you .... Turn off the inner thoughts, just turn them off, don't listen to them. Don't give them the time of day. Those thoughts hold us back. Just do it. You sound fab x

I want to want you. I want to want you so fucking bad. But can I let myself... like, really, let myself want you? No. Because I have no fucking confidence. People did this sort of stuff when we were 16, I'm 21 and stuff haven't fucking kissed someone properly. I haven't had sex. And yet I'm supposed to live up to this reputation that I have of the whole cool, popular, attractive guy who did all this crap years before anyone else. Reputations mean nothing when there's no truth behind them, and god knows I didn't start it. I want to want you so badly. I want to kiss you so badly. I wanted to kiss you tonight, when you gave me every chance, but I fucked it up. I fucked it up AGAIN. I hate myself for shit like that. I really, deeply hate myself for this kind of thing.

Nigella's steeley face of determination as she walks into court - that's me that is. I have that picture on my fridge to remind me that no matter how much crap comes my way, never ever let my guard down and be out of control. I will never reveal my inner thoughts to people who know me. That would make me weak and vulnerable.
I don't understand why people around me need to gossip, and to ask someone else "what they think" about every minute aspect of their lives. What do they expect to achieve? Surely the person to make the best decisions in someone's life is the person who knows the most about the person, ie the person themselves. My opinion - stop fucking gossiping about crap, get off your fat bone idle backsides and do something. Talk is cheap.

Why do people talk such mundane crap nowadays? I mean really? I have kept a list today, I have been spoken to about the dog shitting in the garden, Joey Essex leaving the jungle, how clean the office is, how we are having pork for dinner and how the potatoes will be peeled after Emmerdale. FFS - it has got to be linked to a persons IQ.
I tried today to start a conversation about the Germans treatment of the Jews, what came back .... Joey Essex says WW1 ended in 1979. No one in my house knows that there is a BBC4 let alone watch it.
Soaps, xfactor, strictly = food for the brain dead

Shut the fuck up and do the work yourself I can't fucking stand it when you're like this, sometimes things are you fault and not just mine

"So happy my Billy has got A* in physics exam", "oh Tarquin has just passed the 11+ we are so proud!" "Little Amy top of the class again". These are my very favourite posts on facebook. As if I do not feel like a failure already with a pissed off 15 year old teenager, them some yummy mummy posts how well her little off spring is doing and I feel totally and utterly crap.
Oh god, I have just spent the last hour yelling at my daughter to come have a look at the computer so she can find her homework task, let alone do it. I bet little Tarquin has found it, done it, made mum a cup of tea and is practising his violin as we speak.
I am sooooo pissed off, I have never ever, ... EVER been able to post anything that remotely boasts of my daughter's achievements. Tomorrow I am going to have the "you are to write on lined paper and put your notes in a folder" argument as at the moment, any notes are scrawled on a bit of printer paper left on the desk and then ripped up when she gets cross.
Believe you me, I have tried the nasty mum, the understanding mum, the loving mum, the "I will do your bloody homework for you" mum. Soon to come "you are grounded again" mum and finally I will resort to the not speaking to her at all mum.
One day she will give me something to boast about that I may choose to, (if I want to rub people up the wrong way) put on facebook - until then dear Moanlog I resort to reading of others achievements which without fail compound my own daughters complete lack of success at anything. I will read of them, but I won't like them, in fact if there was an unlike button I would press that.

Fuck going to work today

I think I might be bisexual. Didn't see that one coming.

I haven't done anything wrong. I've hardly seen you today. You're pissing me off. Stop acting like a child.